Tunes for my Saturday morning

I have to get my glasses repaired.

That's all.

Lately i've been listening that album a lot.

I'm feeling little bit lost. I want to find my creativity and excitemend again. I need it.
Maybe i have to just sit down and start.

I wear all the time black. Am I going into depression?

I'm going to take a shower.

Life feels better when Elkie sings in my room.

Christmas is past now. It went pretty nicely and i got lovely gifts. Books mostly.

I found a cute little suitcase for my art supplies and i bought today Elkie Brooks best album. Love is playing in my room now. oh oh oh .

breathing breathing breathing.

Mind filled with sweet nothings

Holaa! One and only picture. Stupid. But it's so good album and cost 1e only. I'm happy

I really am. There's one guy who gives me what i been waiting for. Sweet sounds and touches.

aah

I only wish that i could learn to speak. Communicate with people. What people want to hear and what not.

times when don't feel like

Hi there! First of all, i look like a duck. duck duck duck. new glasses.

I feel so sad. I've been thinking, do i make myself sad? Or am i just pushing good things away. Or bad things just comes to me.

Fuck.

I think i have to be quiet and alone. No harm to anybody.
But i don't want to be quiet and alone!!  But when i open my mouth, i sound just like a duck..

I want to do something. I have to get cigarette smell out of my room..
What's wrong with me?

Don't hold back, time is come to... ?

I returned today morning from Stockholm to home. And gaash i want back! peolpe are so nice there or at least the employees. I was making good conversation with Monki's employee, he was great! I must looked very clueless, i think. I founded something to wear on and one dvd.

Oh i don't want to live here anymore. I'm bored. i listened this when i was younger and my friends doesn't liked it. I remembered this and now i'm listening it again. ha.

 Dance out of the misery. Works.

Smoke fills the lungs

Hey!

I took some gasps yesterday. Me and my friend went to watch Moonrise Kindom and ooh it was so sweet. I smiled throw the hole movie. Andersson just knows how to do it.
Then we talked with my friend, it's so great that you can talk to someone who listen.

I don't know how to be social. I'm behind others. When i learn to talk?

Fear.

And the heart is hard to translate,
It has a language of it's own,
It talks in tongues and quiet sighs
And prayers and proclamations,
In the grand days of great men
And the smallest of gestures,
In short shallow gasps.

But with all my education,
I can't seem to command it,
And the words are all escaping,
And coming back all damaged,
And I would put them back in poetry,
If I only knew how,
I can't seem to understand it.

And I would give all this and heaven too,
I would give it all if only for a moment,
That I could just understand
The meaning of the word, you see,
'Cause I've been scrawling it forever,
But it never makes sense to me at all.

And it talks to me in tiptoes,
And sings to me inside,
It cries out in the darkest night,
And breaks in morning light.

But with all my education,
I can't seem to command it,
And the words are all escaping,
And coming back all damaged,
And I would put them back in poetry,
If I only knew how,
I can't seem to understand it.

And I would give all this and heaven too,
I would give it all if only for a moment,
That I could just understand
The meaning of the word, you see,
'Cause I've been scrawling it forever,
But it never makes sense to me at all.

No words or language,
It doesn't deserve such treatment,
And all my stumbling phrases,
Never amounted to anything worth this feeling,
All this heaven,
Never could describe such a feeling as I'm having,
Words were never so useful,
So I was screaming out a language
That I never knew existed before.

-Florence & the machine, All this and heaven too.

This is so great song, i just love it!

New week ahead

I'm super super tired. Skin looks horrible and good if i see something.
Thighs are so strained... stupid dance moves.

Ouh and i get great pleasure in painting again. Something else to think. 
That's good!

Can't stop moving and eating rice cakes.

Dreamy pop

Hey i want to share a song from my friends band. They are great! More songs is hopefully coming and will be. I think. But anyways push play and then let the mind just float.

I'm melancholy

Why people are so so so... i don't know. So confusing.

I'm so lost but excited.

Woopwoop! I'm so excited that coffee just makes me crazy. Flooooow floooow
Come say hi to me! if you see girl in pink shorts. New people are cool.

Little bit miserable about one thing, but i'm going to pass it. and not worry.
And everything is all right, i'm proud of myself and no stress anymore, maybe little bit afraidness.. but that is good, right?

Why it is so hard?

I fall in love with dark-skinned men, who knows how to sing. I love jazz.
Look at Charles is he crying? i bet he is. He just sings with passion, that's real thing. Love.

Oh and look newest Trendi magazine page 31. I fell in love with him also, i think i will draw him.

Stop me oh oh stop me

Panic panic panic! I'm just rolling my thumbs and think what the hell i should do. I was planning to move and be free, but one email can just ruin everything.. Now i have to star over and damn two weeks left. I want to change my school and do like art stuff., but all thought i like making clothes too. hmph. in chrismas we have underwear course maybe i want to stay there.

When it's okay to lie about a thing? I don't know what else i should do (now i'm talking different thing) oh when i can see rainbows and happy stuff...

Now i'm biting my fingernails and listening ride and soon taking laundry out.

"Listen to the sound of the earth turning." -Yoko Ono

Hobla! I'm alive. I guess so.. My eyes are working so then i'm alive.
My computer has been shut up because i was three days in Stockholm. It was nice! I'm never going to bored that city! All thought i have been there many many times.
I spend part of my money and bought nice things. I found few movies, Blow job-poster, old filmcamera (hoping that it's working..) and nice clothes, most from vintage stores.

We went in Yoko Ono "Grapefruit" exhibition , it was beautiful. Her mind is beautiful. All the thoughs and film scenes.
I was stupid, wait.. or rather thoughtless. There was a stairs and at the top was a computer. And note were called, write your dream in the computer and save it. I write.. and quietly in my mind thought it.
Then my daddy pointed his finger to the roof. And there it was, my text. I was feeling so much embarrassing. I didn't wanted that to happen. I wanted to cry. Maybe that will fade away..

I want kisses! Kissing is great! Oh how i miss it.

I'm in love

His voice is oh! he just stands and slowly killing me with him coolness. And that redwine glass <3

Give me one more change

I WAS ON FIRE! Bloc party, metronomy and two door cinema club was so great! and oh snooooop double g o d, i just danced in the mud. i let the beat float in my body and scream the songs out of my mouth and just enjoy! Oh now i have to take my single-use camera to the camerashop and wait excited my photos. but that must be my luck that i pay lots of money and i'll just get black photos... oh we wait, then i scan them and i'll show it to you.
But now listen this, i can't get enough.

I knew i was ugly.

 

Loving joose and smelling weird. like smoke and barbeque mushrooms. And thinking too much that i don't even know any more what i'm thinking.

We are all weird

This make me smile with my eyes, but mouth just look the same. Watch this movie if you haven't seen it yet. It contains lots of good. Smile smile smile.

"I don't shut up, i grow up, and when i look at you, i throw up. äää."